*Yawn*

So I've got physio tomorrow and I am sooooooooooooo glad!!

I also am on leave from work and can spend all day with Clarence on the 19/12/2008, freaking awesome!!!!

Am thinking quite a bit of Hairy Potter, a guy I like. He's cute I think, funny, has protective qualities, has the cutest smile, and the most sparkling eyes. I wish I knew him better.

Even though I won't be back at work until 2/01/2008, I really want to get back there just so I can IM him with "Go Away!" meaning of course the opposite!!!

I think he's a real special guy, one in a million. I don't know if he has someone in his life, but I really hope he doesn't. I don't know much about guys, but I do know we've done our first bit of flirting and my face turns red and scrunchy-uppy every time I think of that "moment" we had.

I hope he is the "one" if not, that will be ok too. I can tell, that I think he is the type of guy I "need" a well adjusted guy who has the sensitivity to say to a complete stranger: "Awww are you sad?" its funny, but if we ever fall in love and he reads this blog one day. I'll have to admit, that that moment may have been when I first "fell in love" with him.

I've got to keep it real though. I don't want the emotion getting to my head like it has in the past.

*Sigh* its so hard to stop myself from day dreaming about him and realising that I've got an idea, of who he is, not the whole picture. He will have annoying habits that I will probably come to despise so much that I'll nag him about the head and as a result, send him into his cave.

As much as I think I am perfect, I hope my confidence doesn't get in the way of being human. My ego-strength [insert link] is healthy but a bit off-kelter at the moment.

I still find it so amazing that after one conversation with SweetGuy*-* he went into his cave. All I said to him was:

Zen: "I think you're being a boyfriend and I don't need a boyfriend, I don't want to rush things, I just need a friend."

SweetGuy: "I don't want to rush things either," gasping for breath, trying not to cry. [I can only guess that is what happened]

Boy did I cry over that one!! My first real heartbreak I think. Yet it was good to feel it at the time. Damn hard to get over. Coz that brilliant imagination of mine had set me up with his family - all six (6) kids and grand kids and I'd even run through several scenarios on how I'd speak to his youngest boy - 16 to 21 his girls - 28 to 30+

I think it is quite sad that I planned it all out and then had that disappointment that its all over and completely over. I don't think he'll call back. As much as he could be my type, I don't think he'd ever get over the generation gap.

Well I'm tired.

Hairy Potter is about my age. We've already discovered that we watched the Muppets [he mimicked Animal when he was a kid and his parents took his drums away from him - so cute!! I wonder if he has a scar on his forehead, he also has the cutest curl in the middle of his forehead, hence the nickname Hairy Potter, I love that he has HP's dark hair too, *deep voice* Tall, Dark and Handsome :) ] and he's sad/trapped that he's been in an IT/Graphic Artist job for over 10 years. I can only gestimate he is 27 maybe, I'm hoping mid 30's. I think he is more mature than me and I do need that in a guy.

I need someone I can grow older with. I plan on being lumpy and ugly and that he won't care, well he better not or watch out buddy!! It's my damn body - not yours and I can put choclit and crap in my mouth if I damn well want to!!! So hmmphffff!!! I won't be no body's trophy wife, if he ever developed those tendencies, boy watch out!!!

I do feel sorry for the guy I marry, I've learned lately that I have expensive taste in jewellry, perfume and handbags. I wonder if he'll ever be able to make me happy with the joint/single income we earn. I am crossing my fingers for a real ruby and diamond engagement ring. I'd go into that story [insert link] if it was relevant here, but I won't :)




I hope he is the one... I've been patient, really I have, well ok, I've not been patient, but I've done too many dumb girl mistakes, well may be a few... but I've resolved them as best as I could.

*Nighty night Clarence!!!*



*-* A name to protect his innocence